Sunday, April 22, 2007

Tarot cards and procrastinating.

I was going to write a post about Spring cleaning. Not just the typical cleaning out of closets and junk...but me realizing I needed to do Spring cleaning in every way. Physically, Emotionally, Spiritually, and the list goes on from there.

And then I went here and pulled a card.

You are The Star

Hope, expectation, Bright promises.

The Star is one of the great cards of faith, dreams realised

The Star is a card that looks to the future. It does not predict any immediate or powerful change, but it does predict hope and healing. This card suggests clarity of vision, spiritual insight. And, most importantly, that unexpected help will be coming, with water to quench your thirst, with a guiding light to the future. They might say you're a dreamer, but you're not the only one.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

I've decided to save the Spring cleaning post for later.
I'm going to sit with this for a day or so.

...and it got me to thinking

I was over at the ImapatientPatient and she has been checking out her blog stats. I'm not so savvy to do this. I have no idea if Bl0gger can do this stuff. But it's pretty interesting. And then it started the wheels turning in my head. Wondering. Just who reads this blog anyway? I mean some of you are friends in real life. I told you about it and gave you the link. Even those of you that don't post I at least know you read. Then there are those of you that are my cyber friends (that sounds naughty.) Some of you know me better than some that know me IRL. Then there are some of you that have found this place via other's blog rolls. Don't get me wrong...I am not naive in thinking that this is totally anonymous. One of R's coworkers found this blog from another infertility blog and then recognized the story. She, honestly and sweetly, fessed up to R one day. But what I'm saying is I know this all out there in cyberspace and it's completely public for anyone to read. I suppose it doesn't matter how you get here. BUT. Once my wheels started turning I was wondering if there are (and I think there are) people out there that know me IRL and found this blog in some way other than me telling them about it. Which is all fine and dandy. UNLESS. You have decided to read along and. Not. Tell. Me. Call me crazy but it feels a little bit like someone's reading my mail behind my back. Kinda sorta effed up don't ya think?

And then again I might be having some delusions of grandeur that this blog is all that. Ha!


See what thinking gets me into?

Don't think I'll look into whether or not Bl0gger can track hits like w0rdpress can.
For me, sometimes too much information is just that.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

April 12

Tess and Oliver
I cannot believe it's been two years since you were born and gone.
Two years since I held you both in my hands and kissed your sweet toes.
MiMi sang you songs, Mommy showed you 'this little piggy' and Daddy looked you over and over.
We counted every finger and every toe. Burned you into our memories. Not a day has gone by that we have not thought of you. Your little sister arrived on August 4th. We talk to her about both of you all the time. Right after she was born we went up to the cabin and one morning I looked outside and saw this....

two fawns.

I told Davis it was you two telling all of us that you knew she was here and reminding us that you would be watching over her.
Thank you for that. It's nice to get signs.

Today we are still holding you in that peaceful place...but still missing you more than words can say.

Our sweet sweet babies, oh how we love you so.
Mommy and Daddy

Saturday, April 07, 2007

A Little Tooth

Week before last was particularly brutal. Butterfly did not sleep. At. All. Even when she was sleeping she was wiggling and moaning. On Sunday she got her first tooth. And then it all made sense to a zombie Mom & Dad.

The New York MTA has this "Poetry in Motion" campaign. It's surely some form of advertising, but honestly I just stick to the poetry. This one had been a stand out for a while...and now it really applies.
I just hope DL never runs off with some "sweet talker on his way to jail"

A Little Tooth
by Thomas Lux

Your baby grows a tooth, then two,
and four, and five, then she wants some meat
directly from the bone. It's all

over: she'll learn some words, she'll fall
in love with cretins, dolts, a sweet
talker on his way to jail. And you,

your wife, get old, flyblown, and rue
nothing. You did, you loved, your feet
are sore. It's dusk. Your daughter's tall.