The hole

I've a got a hole in my heart. I've got a hole in life. I've got a hole in my family tree.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about how to describe this hole and how it feels. Not for anyone necessarily, but more for helping myself process these feelings.

I read an article about the babies that were in the NICU in Baton Rouge. Before Katrina hit they were evacuated. Because they were not patients, their parents were not evacuated with them. One sweet teeney little baby has yet to be claimed. His parents and siblings are among the missing. They have found this little one's aunt, but none of his immediate family.

I felt a kindred spirit to this little baby. He too will have a hole. I pray that he will grow up in a household full of love and happiness. But he, like me, will have a hole that will always be there. He, like me, will be missing people he never knew. He will have no memories of his mother, father and siblings. What they looked like, sounded like...what it felt like to be hugged by them.

I hope that he grows up with (new) parents that love him and cherish him. I too hope to go on and have more children to love and cherish. While this will help and bring much happiness, it will not fill the hole. We will still have these people we never knew that will always be missed.